Dear Diary, It seems like yesterday when I arrived at my Forever Home, filled with all these gullible house cats. You would think after five years they would have a clue about my sense of humor. Alas, compared to my superior Turkish Van DNA, their intelligence is right up there with field mice. Especially my precious little DoriDeer. She believes every word I say, and then goes running to Mom to blame me for tricking her. Or, as she would say with her lisp, "twicking" her.
After what I pulled on her this morning, I wonder if it's too soon to tell her the bedtime treats Mom doles out are made with organic dinosaur meat, and if she eats them, she will turn into Blue from Jurassic World. Since that big lizard really freaked her out, I'm sure to get a double portion.